iT sEEMS lIKE i sAY tHIS eVERY tiME bUT rEALLY iT sEEMS lIKE fOREVER sINCE i'VE bEEN oN mY cOMPUTER aT aLL. i wAS rEALLY bORED aT wORK tODAY lOOKING aT aLL tHESE oTHER pEOPLES bLOGS tHINKING tO mYSELF hOW bORING aND uN-FUN mY lIFE iS. i fEEL lIKE aLL tHESE oTHER pEOPLE aRE dOING aLL tHESE cUTE tHINGS wITH thEIR fAMILIES aND aLL i'M dOING iS wORKING aND cOMING hOME tO sICK cHILDREN. lIVE nEVER iS wHAT iT sEEMS, i'M sTARTING tO fIND tHAT oUT. i fEEL lIKE i cAN nEVER lET mY tRUE sELF oUT, mAYBE tHAT'S bECAUSE i dON'T kNOW wHO tHAT rEALLY iS. i'M oNE wAY aT wORK, oNE wAY wITH mY fAMILY, aND oNE wAY wITH mY fRIENDS. i rEALLY dO wANT tO bE aLL tHE sAME pERSON ( dON'T gET mE wRONG i'M nOT fAKE, jUST a sLIGHTLY dIFFERENT vERSION oF tHE sAME pERSON.). sO hERE iT gOES fRIENDS aND mOSTLY fAMILY. dON'T bE sHOCKED, mAD, uPSET, dISAPPOINTED (mOM & gRANDMA) bUT hERE aRE sOME tHINGS tHAT yOU mAY nOT kNOW aBOUT mE. fIRST aND fORMOST... i hAVE a tATOO. iT'S oN mY fOOT iT'S a lILY aND yES tHAT'S wHY i wEAR sOCKS aLL tHE tIME
. i lOVE iT bUT i dON'T wANT tO dISAPPOINT aNY oF mY fAMILY bECAUSE tHEY hAVE sUCH sTONG fEELINGS aBOUT tHESE tHINGS. i sTARTED dOING mARY kAY i wANT tO bE rEALLY gOOD aT iT aND gO fAR aND i tHINK i'LL rEALLY bE aBLE tO iF i cAN gET tHE sUPPORT fROM mY fAMILY. aLSO hERE iS a bIG oNE rEN mOVED oUT aND fOR sOME rEASON tHAT iS rEALLY hARD fOR mE tO tELL pEOPLE. iT'S lIKE i'M eMBARRESED tHAT aFTER bEING tOGETHER fOR 7 yEARS dATING wE cAN'T sEEM tO pULL iT tOGETHER bEING mARRIED fOR mORE tHAN a yEAR aND a hALF. pEOPLE sAY tHE fIRST yEAR iS tHE hARDEST, bUT rEALLY... tHIS hARD?!!! k sO tHERE iS mY vENT sESSION. jUST a fEW tHINGS bUT fOR sOME rEASON mOSTLY fOR mY fAMILIES sAKE wERE rEALLY hARD fOR mE tO sAY. i dON'T kNOW wHY fOR sOME rEASON iT'S eASIER tO wRITE iT tO sOMEONE tHEN tO tELL iT tO tHEM iN pERSON.
. i lOVE iT bUT i dON'T wANT tO dISAPPOINT aNY oF mY fAMILY bECAUSE tHEY hAVE sUCH sTONG fEELINGS aBOUT tHESE tHINGS. i sTARTED dOING mARY kAY i wANT tO bE rEALLY gOOD aT iT aND gO fAR aND i tHINK i'LL rEALLY bE aBLE tO iF i cAN gET tHE sUPPORT fROM mY fAMILY. aLSO hERE iS a bIG oNE rEN mOVED oUT aND fOR sOME rEASON tHAT iS rEALLY hARD fOR mE tO tELL pEOPLE. iT'S lIKE i'M eMBARRESED tHAT aFTER bEING tOGETHER fOR 7 yEARS dATING wE cAN'T sEEM tO pULL iT tOGETHER bEING mARRIED fOR mORE tHAN a yEAR aND a hALF. pEOPLE sAY tHE fIRST yEAR iS tHE hARDEST, bUT rEALLY... tHIS hARD?!!! k sO tHERE iS mY vENT sESSION. jUST a fEW tHINGS bUT fOR sOME rEASON mOSTLY fOR mY fAMILIES sAKE wERE rEALLY hARD fOR mE tO sAY. i dON'T kNOW wHY fOR sOME rEASON iT'S eASIER tO wRITE iT tO sOMEONE tHEN tO tELL iT tO tHEM iN pERSON.
3 comments:
Liesl im so sorry that you are going through these hard times. This may seem weird coming from me I haven't known you that long but I also come from LDS family and for me to have a tattoo is a huge deal but just remember you are a beautiful child of god no matter what! Also I wanted to share this quote with you it helped me when I was having problems in my marrige.
“Giving up doesn’t always mean you are weak, sometimes it means that you are strong enough to let go. “
I hope that everything will work out for you in time and I will keep you in my prayers.
Wow, Liesl that was really a great blog. I am the exact same way with my family too... I am a totally different person around different people and it's not because I am being fake, it's just how it happens to be. You aren't the only one. Don't be ashamed of anything that has happened. You are not to blame, sometimes things just don't work out. Don't ever let anyone make you feel guilty or bad because I know you are a great person and you have so much going for you. I love ya! Oh and p.s.... nobody's life is as exciting as it may look on the outside or on their blog. I promise, it's not. Everyone just goes through the motions like the rest of us.
Loves and kisses
Linds
Liesl this blog was awesome. It just goes to show how strong you are since you put all of that out there all at once! I'm really sorry things have been rough, but Linsay is right. No one's life is as perfect as it seems- especially the way people portray it on thier blogs. Everyone goes through rough times, and you have nothing do be embarrassed about. What matters is that you keep doing everything you can. You're tattoo rocks. And I love it. Having it is just a way that you have found to express yourself. Everyone loves you regardless of what you do! I really am amazed by all your strength, you are awesome!! Everything will work it's self out. I wish you all the happiness in the world! You're in my prayers too :)
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